Vicky, thank you for leaving your comment. I agree that the FI community is still predominantly male, but I would love to chat more if you ever need a female perspective! Congratulations on achieving FI!

I really appreciate this comment. I completely agree that all numbers are required to see a complete picture and I love your analogy. $3 million would seem like a fortune to most, but if your life situations had been different you might be worth twice that much. I do think you shouldn’t be so hard on yourself. We don’t all ride the same roller coaster in life, some of us have ups and downs that others will never experience. Perhaps your doctor friends did not experience the same bumps in the road. Unfortunately, that is life and the real power is getting through those events and continuing to push through them. Thank you so much for your comment.

The trouble is that without numbers, we earned this and saved this, it’s difficult for readers to adjust the results accordingly. If a man says “I press 200 pounds “ I immediately ask how much he weighs.

I was a doctor married to a doctor and we made ridiculous money at 30. An expensive divorce, remarriage, support of parents and in-laws, lots of children to educate, it all took a toll. So I have 3 million which is shockingly low considering what I have earned. Some would consider me “rich”, but I’m a failure for my own peers and I know it! I won’t be able to retire early, because my expenses are still 20k per month, 1/4 of it various insurances.

I do my own lawn, snow removal, repairs, housekeeping etc and have no idea how people live on 60k per year. I look at their budgets and they seem to be missing things you should have, like high end car insurance with umbrella etc. I only wish the explanation was that I lived in a HCOL area!

With a name like ‘modest millionaires’ I’m sure you can relate to this post. Ha. Ha. I think it’s hard to talk about money and wealth building in a way that doesn’t come off as bragging.i mean even if I’m not bragging others who have amassed less may see it as though I am. I want to keep the conversations flowing and it’s often difficult to figure out how to do that in a helpful way. It sounds like you struggle with the same issue. There is a long road to travel between $1 and $1 million. It’s tough to describe that and share it particularly when you don’t know someone else’s circumstance. For example, sharing that with a well paid software engineer is much different for me than sharing it with someone who is not. I grew up in a modest home financially speaking. I try to put myself in the shoes of where I’ve been to figure out how to share in a way that helps, but it’s not easy. And as I grow farther from my past to present day it gets harder to tell the early life lessons that got me from there to here. Thanks for the comment.

You are indeed inspirational. I love the honesty that allows us to see that all of it, the financial success and the efforts, circumstances and sometimes luck that all each played a part in reaching it are not clear and easy things to replicate or even communicate. I feel it’s a better representation of “real life” to include these dilemmas we can all face. Even for people who don’t blog, it’s hard to know where that line stands between comfort, sharing information that can be helpful & over sharing to the point of boasting. Especially in this social media world of today!

As I may have mentioned at Fincon, I’ve been struggling with this blogger/anonymous identity when it comes to wanting to interact in real life and in my community to perhaps help others with financial literacy . Right now I share a lot of numbers on my blog.. is this helpful? Is this safe for our family if people know this in person? Does the blog name having “millionaires” in it instantly turn off people who don’t feel comfortable with their finances or does it provide an incomplete picture of the nuance that comes with building wealth in various circumstances? Anyways, all this to say your post really does it home for me!

Thank you for the kind words. It’s been a tough balancing act, but I definitely hear more women in the personal finance space getting louder. More women are raising their voices and hopefully the trend will continue so that we can cheer each other on without discouraging others.

Yet I so do understand the reluctance – like it or not, women are judged differently from men when championing their own achievements.