Comments on: Financial Dishonesty in Marriage: Signs of Financial Infidelity

By: Isabel

Isabel — Mon, 19 May 2025 02:38:59 +0000

Yes is exhausting my husband don’t even ask me if I am ok because I had my money before married i don’t need him but he never have a communication with me about an honest financial matter

By: Isabel

Isabel — Mon, 19 May 2025 02:34:53 +0000

In reply to Isabelle johnson. Yes is exhausting my husband don't even ask me if I am ok because I had my money before married i don't need him but he never have a communication with me about an honest financial matter

By: Isabel

Isabel — Mon, 19 May 2025 02:31:28 +0000

In reply to Angela @ Tread Lightly Retire Early. Me too just we have one join account for daily needs that's all I have my own bank and the other he has he put my name as join

By: jane

jane — Tue, 09 Jan 2024 09:33:37 +0000

WHAT ABOUT WHEN A HUSBAND WILL NOT PUT YOUR NAME ON THE HOUSE
WHEN THEY WILL NOT SHARE WHAT IS IN THE BANK
WHEN THEY DONT INCLUDE YOU IN DECISIONS

By: Isabelle johnson

Isabelle johnson — Sat, 08 Jul 2023 01:34:51 +0000

I don’t mean to hide finances but my husband almost always refuses to discuss them unless there is something he wants to do and then he gets mad when I tell him the exact amount. He also definitely doesn’t want to stick to purchase limits that were his idea. Currently the rule is if it’s a personal item that no one else can use, all purchases over 50 bucks we discuss. Lately though his attitude has been it’s my money so I can do whatever I want and in the past he has made credit card payments so big that if i needed something for kids or house, I had no choice but to use a card. That’s his response put it on a card but then he gets mad when it’s time to pay it off. I am walking on eggshells constantly. His newest obsession is upgrading the house. Even if we didn’t have credit card debt, we are not in a position to just drop 5000 out of nowhere as we have 1200 coming out in the next month for replace the kitchen floor and refinish kitchen cupboards which must be done and the labor charge for that, our city bill for 2 months and car insurance for 6 months. Then we have back to school shopping and our son’s 16th birthday for aug and beginning of sept, the other half of property taxes which is 900 by mid October and he has a religious holiday in October that he wants to do a 2 week family road trip to visit his family and celebrate. Recently he just went and decided he needed 2 tattoos that cost around 400 each. I am exhausted from trying to manage all of it.

By: One Frugal Girl

One Frugal Girl — Wed, 11 Dec 2019 03:36:53 +0000

In reply to She’s FIRE’d.

I hadn’t thought much about separate versus joint accounts. I feel like my husband and I are extremely honest because our accounts are all tied up together. I do have a small account and a credit card, because I want to keep things in my name, but all expenses are charged primarily to one credit card and paid from our joint account. Of course, this wouldn’t prevent us from opening another account the other doesn’t know about. Which was the case for my PayPal account. You and Angela have definitely given me something to think about.

As for the dishonesty statistics I think you are right. I have a lot of friends who hide purchases from their spouses. It seems quite typical to me too.

By: One Frugal Girl

One Frugal Girl — Wed, 11 Dec 2019 03:34:06 +0000

In reply to Angela @ Tread Lightly Retire Early. Interesting point Angela. You aren't hiding your purchases, but you don't have to provide a list of them to your significant other either. I wonder if that gets around this problem or if that could create more dishonesty, because you have access to accounts that the other doesn't know about. With that access you could set aside money or wrack up more credit card debt. Hmmm.

By: She's FIRE'd

She's FIRE'd — Tue, 10 Dec 2019 02:34:31 +0000

I suspect financial dishonesty happens more often than the statistics you quoted. I work in personal finance and clients tell me about accounts and purchases they hide from their spouses all the time. I don’t do it because like the other commenter, I have a separate checking account from my husband. We’re both very frugal and have very few spending disagreements. Which is not to say we always agree on financial goals, just not spending…

By: Angela @ Tread Lightly Retire Early

Angela @ Tread Lightly Retire Early — Sun, 08 Dec 2019 21:17:08 +0000

I think the reason why we don’t hide any financial stuff from each other is BECAUSE we have separate accounts (in addition to joint). There are things we definitely don’t agree on, but we don’t have to, because that spending is with our own separate money