My mom went through some dpression after losing two brothers in two years. She gained a lot of weight. I didn’t pressure her to lose weight or eat better because I didn’t want to make her feel bad about herself. Instead, I pressured her to go to the doctor for a full physical (cholesterol, glucose, etc.) because we have a family history of diabetes and cancer.

It took a long time to convince her to go, but she finally did. She found out that she was right on the verge of sevral health problems, but she had time to turn it around. I let the doctors scare her, and then she was ready to change.

I work out with her five times a week (if you can’t do this, find a buddy for your dad). Her eating habits still aren’t wonderful (she tends to skip meals–bad for blood sugar), but they’ve improved.

Also, no major changes to diet or exercise all at once. Encourage your dad to make small changes over time, like swapping whole grain pasta for regular pasta.

Don’t encourage fads like Atkins. They don’t work, and people usually regain the weight, sometimes more.

swimming at a local pool is great exercise, and very easy on the body.

I like the idea of having snacks and other healthy foods available on a more regular and permanent basis. I will try to recruit my mom to make healthier choices available for him.

I also like the buddy idea. I don’t live close enough to my dad to exercise with him. My mom does encourage him, but usually she fails to get him to walk her.

I may be able to recruit my brother, (who lives just a few minutes away from my parents), to exercise with him. Even one night a week would be better than nothing.

I’m wondering if I could get my dad a fitness coach, or if he would resent me horribly for doing something like that. It’s not exactly a buddy, but it may be good motivation to have someone watching his progress and encouraging him to exercise.

While I research that I’m also going to look into a Weight Watcher’s membership for my dad.

As the anonymous commenter noted, my dad has to want to change his habits, but I’ll certainly do all I can to encourage him.

1) Make it clear (if it hasn’t already) that you are openminded and willing to talk to him about methods to lose weight, be his buddy to talk him down when he’s craving an unhealthy snack, etc., walk/run with him (if you live close).

2) Talk about your difficulties with eating correctly, exercising regularly, etc. Sometimes when you’re off the wagon, it’s hard when others are so ‘good’ at keeping a routine that you can’t seem to follow. make sure he knows everyone struggles, and it’s a day to day, one-decision at a time kind of thing, not all or nothing, which is how he seems to live.

3) who buys his food? If it’s your mom, maybe she can cut back on the junk food buying and lay out easy healthy snacks–I know that I would eat better if there were a plate of yummy cut up fruit and veggies in the fridge to snack on quickly.

4) Make it a family thing. If you guys are ALL committed to helping him, when you get together, ONLY have healthy foods available. Additionally, go for a walk as a family after the meal; make it a social, fun family activity.

5) when the grandkid is older, use him to motivate your dad. i know i was a big factor in getting my dad to stop drinking–a few words from me were all he needed.

Good Luck! I also struggle with my dad’s unhealthy habits. It’s tough to see them kill themselves slowly…

A program like weight watchers might help, but really you have to figure out what might motivate him, and then find what’s keeping him from acting on it. In my mom’s case, she KNOWS she is unhealthy and has tens of thousands of dollars in medical debt to prove it; she is often just too lazy (her word) and unmotivated to change because, really, junk food tastes good and she doesn’t like anything that seems like work.

My mom feels nagged, too, whether it’s because I offered to pay for a gym membership or exercise equipment, cook for her or give her some food ideas, or sometimes just because she calls and I’m at the gym. What can we really do?

Your dad has to want to do it for himself, and he has to feel that there’s really something worth living for and know that he’s in control of his life. I don’t mean to imply at all that he doesn’t care about you, but that’s somehow disconnected from his lifestyle choices.

If you can, unpack these issues with him, or at least get him started. Then be there with an arsenal of ideas when he’s ready to work – reminders of when he succeeded, new foods to try, and workout ideas that will suit him. Best of luck – I know firsthand that it’s a trying process.

Be warned though – your Dad may be stunned by the amount her has to eat when he starts on Weight Watchers!