My dad died peacefully at his home after a nearly year-long battle with cancer. Nine days before he passed, he told me he wasn’t ready to go. He didn’t fear death.
What he feared was leaving us all behind.
There are so many things I want to say about my dad, but it’s tough to write through my tears. Instead, I’m going to share my dad’s final thoughts.
I found these letters in his estate binder, tucked between the deed to his house and his life insurance details. I consider them more valuable than any financial documents I’ve uncovered.
A dying letter to my children:
You know that having children was such a great event in my life. Having time with you was beyond fatherhood. When we sat on the couch and watched cartoons or went to Star Wars movies, these were great moments in my life to be with my kids.
I love you more than I can express in words. I love you to the moon and back. No matter what happens to me in the end, I know I have great kids who love me as much as I love them. Watching other families that are not that lucky is sad.
When God takes me away from you, know that your dad loved you so much that it hurts to think I will not be able to see you and hear and tell you how much your dad loves you.
My dad wrote this first letter the day he was diagnosed with cancer.
A dying letter to my family:
I am not sure how long I have left on this earth, but I wanted to write some thoughts down. I have been a very lucky man for over 75 years as God has guided my life down many roads and turns, and I have always felt that he was there watching out for me.
I had a wonderful life with a great wife, kids, grandchildren, and a thoughtful, loving daughter-in-law and son-in-law. My brother-in-law and wife could not have been better.
I never asked for more than I had except for an occasional winning lottery ticket to help the family.
Let’s start with my wife. You have always been the love of my life. Somebody to be my friend, my lover, and my companion. We rarely disagreed and were very happy. We made a life with what we had and never reached beyond that.
I was blessed with great loving children. They are wonderful people who are raising amazing grandchildren. They are all smart, and I hope they have great futures.
People probably do not think I am religious, but I talk to God every night to communicate my thoughts and prayers with him. He has guided me throughout my life.
I have tried to keep friends that have passed my way in life and appreciate all of them. My brothers and I have never been close, but I believe we love each other.
I have had a wonderful life, and if it is meant to end soon, I will never regret how lucky I have been.